Combine an industrious nature with sheer stupidity and you have one reliable recipe for disaster folks! Good ole boy Dennis LeRoy Anderson of Proctor, Minnesota is known for having a way with engines, a desire for comfort and mobility, and penchant for getting regularly sauced.
Being the clever 60 something year old fella that he is, Dennis came up with the brilliant plan to take his beloved La-Z-Boy recliner and kit it out with nothing less than:
-a Briggs & Stratton engine …as you do!
-a steering wheel, headlights, and power antenna …but of course!
-hot rod racing stickers …‘cause you gots to look cool!
-a stereo …what would a tricked-out ride be without some dope tunes?
-and those ever-important cup holders …so you can take the party with you baby!
Apparently Mr. Ass-for-brains thought his ride was da bomb, so much so that one night he decided it would be good fun to take his prized converted lounge chair out on the road and down to the local pub …as you do.
Dennis proceeded to consume no less than 8 or 9 cold ones in the bar before heading out. He then strapped himself into his motorized La-Z-Boy, revved up the engine and attempted to drive off -- at which point he lost control of his furniture and crashed bumper car style into a parked Dodge Intrepid.
Shortly thereafter when our champion lounge chair rider was looking around and no doubt wondering WTF had just happened, he was arrested by local police for having a blood alcohol level more than three times the legal limit. Being that Dennis (surprisingly) already had another drunken driving conviction under his belt, there was no sweet talking himself out of this one.
Upon facing the judge he pleaded guilty to driving a recliner under the influence and was sentenced to jail time and a stiff fine. And to ensure the future safety of the public, this dumb arse’s decked-out recliner was also impounded and later put up for police auction.
Now I don’t’ know about you, but I’m thinking we should just go ahead and give this dude an honorary ‘Darwin Award’ because he is obviously swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool, and well, we all know that no good can come of that! …I’m just saying…
This is definitely one of those people that needs to have his procreation capabilities revoked. What a moron! I mean seriously, some people just baffle me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the post. :)
http://candicesstories.blogspot.com/
@Candice: The guy was definitely creative but a first rate moron all the same!
ReplyDeleteIf only he used his powers for good instead of stupidity lol.
ReplyDeleteThink if not nominatatd for a Darwin for this he will be eventually.
Sad as it is I think I know a few people like this. Gotta love the imagination and the shear stupidity.
ReplyDeleteJust one of many people who should never breed. There's actually a website for Darwin Awards- darwinawards.com of course.
ReplyDeleteGreat stuff.
@Mynx: Yes, we definitely should nominate him for a Darwin Award. What an asshat!
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@The Chick in the Chair Perspective: Looking forward to reading your posts about people you know like this!
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@Erica: Hopefully this guy hasn't yet spawned! One can only imagine what that disasterous result would look like.
This guy just might be from my hometown. It wouldn't surprise me. I can just picture him driving a f_ing RECLINER down the street! I hope this guy doesn't reproduce. I'd be a wee bit shocked if any chick would have sex with a guy that drives a recliner, though. So there's that.
ReplyDelete@Sweet Charity: Oh gosh, lets hope there aren't clones of this dude! Please take a picture of your version of this asshat. I'd love to read about him on your blog.
ReplyDeleteI found you via a comment you made on The Sassy Curmudgeon (LURVE that blog). If you're a fan of Sassy then you must be good people. Love your blog and am following you now! =]
ReplyDelete- Tiff
http://zenalicious.blogspot.com
LMAO is this for real?!?! Damn, people just have nothing better to do with their time, do they? WOW. I am speechless.
ReplyDelete@The Tiff: Thanks for the blog love! I didn't see you on my followers list though so I appreciate you letting me know. I will check out your blog as well. ...Sassy is great isn't she?
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@Annah: Thank you so much for stopping by! And yes, this is 100% real. I have even read the attorney statements for this particular case. I only wish I had a video of this crazy guy in action. xo
Auction, eh? Where, exactly? ;-)
ReplyDeleteJust messing (mostly)!
-Liz
@Liz and Sean: I believe they had the auction in the same general vacinity as the where the crime originally took place. Apparently the Police Chief had his eye on the prize but then later decided bidding on the La-Z-Boy wasn't such a smart move for a public official.
ReplyDelete@Liz and Sean: And thank you so much for the blog love! New followers are always welcome and appreciated.
ReplyDeleteWow. I wonder what other things people will give engines to and get caught driving drunk in! Thanks for sharing this!
ReplyDeleteJess
@Me, myself and I: Glad you enjoyed this. I'm not sure what else could possibly top a motorized piece of furniture but then again, people never cease to amaze me!
ReplyDeleteHahaha.
ReplyDeleteI was designing this exact same thing... I guess it's back to the drawing board. No point making a motorized lay-z-boy if someone else already be me to it.
http://arealgoodblog.blogspot.com
@Charles: Oh, why the heck not? That sort of contraption would probably lots of fun. And no doubt you would make a far cooler, faster, more stylish version!
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