Insiders and Outsiders on Bachelor Pad

Last night’s 2nd episode of Bachelor Pad continued to deliver on the overly dramatic front. There was further lying, manipulation, strategizing, crying and conniving as participants sub-divided into the cool ‘insiders’ group and the less popular ‘outsiders’ group. Both groups were plotting for domination and ultimately control of the game -- despite looking like a bunch of gross, puking asshats during a hands-free pie eating contest.

Psycho Elizabeth the ‘Bunny Boiler’ still had Kovacs balls in a vice grip and was calling the shots amongst the insiders (Kovacs, Natalie, Jesse B, Tenley, Kiptyn, Dave and a few other morons). Anyone who didn’t get with her program was reminded that their ass would be next on the chopping block. Poor Kovacs wandered around the rest of the show with a concerned look on his face and his tail between his legs. The fact that he managed to get it up long enough to bang Elizabeth in the shower shows just how desperate he is to win the $250,000.

Meanwhile, swimsuit model Gia was clearly running the show amongst the outsiders (Gwen, Peyton, Krisily, Nikki, Craig, the Weatherman plus whomever else they could con over to their side). After Gia won immunity during the girl’s pie eating contest, her plan was to give immunity to creepy Craig thus saving him from being voted off by the insider girls. This plan went well up until the point slime-ball Wes professed his undying love for her during their group date. Gia caved and the rose/immunity went to Wes, leaving Craig as a marked target.

The Weatherman gleefully won immunity during the guy’s pie eating contest. He had a ridiculous group date with Gwen, Peyton and Ashley that entailed them donning swimwear and using their body parts to create a painting. Clueless Weatherman thought he was forming a real love connection with Gwen whom he bestowed with the rose/immunity. Gwen however wasn’t feeling it. She spoke directly into the camera and let everyone know that romance with her and the Weatherman wouldn’t happen in a million years.

Back at the ranch, the scheming continued along with drinking, hot tub hookup’s and various parties campaigning to save their asses from being voted off right up until the last second before elimination. Blah, blah, blah…

By the time the participants were assembled for the elimination ceremony, I honestly didn’t give a shit who got voted off. The only thing that kept me from shutting off the TV was trying to figure out why Natalie thought it would be sexy to wear a Barbie pink tutu and who the eff was responsible for dressing host Chris Harrison in his checkered shirt and polka dot tie ensemble.

In the end Jessie S. and Craig were sent home. Hopefully they are now thanking their lucky stars that neither of them has to endure another day of the jackassery that is otherwise known as Bachelor Pad …because this show sucks!