This past week I had the misfortune of encountering yet another example of dismally poor parenting. The parental unit in question was a female obviously lacking in any sort of natural maternal instincts or ability to set basic boundaries for her child. Case in point:
There I was out running a few errands at one of the big box stores and suddenly I heard this loud and horrific shrieking coming from a child. It sounded as if a pack of wild rapid dogs was chewing off the kid’s legs. The gawd-awful noise continued on for what seemed like ten minutes or so and was progressively getting worse, so much so that I went to go find out what the freaking hell was going on.
What I discovered was a mother completely and utterly ignoring her little boy who was throwing a major temper tantrum of gargantuan proportions. The boy was seated in a shopping cart thrashing wildly about. His mother had her back turned away from him while she was casually browsing through walls of discount handbags …maybe the bitch had a hot date that night and therefore her priorities were elsewhere. Whatever the effin deal was though, that chick looked like she definitely wasn’t getting any mother-of-the-year awards that was for sure!
I stood there shocked for a moment before putting on my ‘child whisperer’ hat and walked right up to the boy. I looked him in the eye, put my finger to my lips and firmly told him to sssshhh! His little boy eyes got wide as saucers. He stopped the blood curdling screaming for all of two seconds before testing my boundaries and commenced with yelling again.
The mother conveniently continued to ignore both me and her child. I proceeded to give the little boy a stern look and told him in a parental sort of way to ‘stop that nonsense NOW because the entire store could hear him carrying on’. He stopped crying for a couple of seconds, looked over at his mother who still had her back turned to us, and let out yet another horror movie worthy scream. Baffled by the mother’s continued neglect, I looked to see if perhaps she was wearing hearing aids. Nope! No hearing aids. And still no acknowledgement by the mother.
I threw my hands up in total disgust, not knowing whether to be sad or pissed, and walked off. There was absolutely no justifiable excuse for her lack of concern, the woman just sucked at being a parent. People like her really ought to be sterilized and have their children taken away. …I’m just saying…
Added bonus video clip of what the little boy in the store will likely grow up to be like:
Happy Weekend ya’ll!
Ok Empress, I love what you write but may I just say that I had a similar situation many years ago when my youngest was a toddler. Now he threw a tantrum in a shop because I wouldnt get him a treat right at the start of the shopping. Now I chose to "ignore" as tantrums are usually a method of attention seeking and emotional blackmail. Although my heart was aching and I had to endure the stares of condemming other shoppers I knew that if i gave in at that point I would have future tantrums and bad behaviour. He continued all through the shop and out on to the footpath.
ReplyDeleteI continued to ignore and finally, exhausted he stopped. I never had another tantrum in public again. What would you have me do? Give in so the behaviour is deemed as aceptable or perhaps spank the naughty boy?
He is now a 13yr old and doing well at school and a very nice kid.
It is the parents who swear and/or pander to their kids every whim that are raising brats.
HEAR HEAR! If only we could implement some kind of testing program that potential parents had to pass before they created devil spawn. I have known kids who were absolute godsends, and their parents rocked. Sadly, I see the exact opposite much more frequently and it just pisses me off. Kids like that end up on the Jersey Shore. I'm just sayin'.
ReplyDeletewow I can't believe she not only ignored her son but also you...Sounds like that women had major problems.
ReplyDeleteVery funny though! :) Happy Weekend!
@Mynx: Thanks for your candid comment and for your continued blog love.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your method worked for you and your son at the time. The situation I experienced seemed to be different in the fact that the mother didn't even speak let alone look at me when I, a complete stranger, came up to her child. Most parents I have discussed this situation with said that they took their misbehaving kids out of the store, restaurant, etc. and told them that they could not behave like that in public. EVER! And until the child learned to behave appropriately in public they were not allowed in public places - or were immediately removed.
Personally I have mixed feelings about spanking children. I agree that parents who swear at or otherwise berate their kids or parents who pander to their children often create maladjusted youngsters with authoritarian issues.
I appreciate that it is challenging work being a parent but there are still plenty of idiots out there who reproduce and do little to provide their off spring with a stable foundation in which to become decent, contributing members of society. I'm guessing this isn't the case with you and your son. Happy Weekend!
-----------------------
@Erica: My point exactly! 'Jersey Shore' like kids seem to becoming more of the norm these days and that is quite unfortunate because they usually end up spawning children that are even worse then they are!
-------------------------
@grrl in green: Glad you enjoyed my little 'true story'! Yes, that woman definitely had major problems. Enjoy your weekend too!
I cannot stand it when I see parents letting their kids cause a ruckus in public. I have two toddlers, and they already know (the oldest is two and a half) that if they start having a fit, momma will take them into the restroom for a whipping. Therefore my kids are perfect angels in public. My momma didn't put up with that mess, and I won't either!
ReplyDeleteI think it is odd that the parent didnt even acknowledge you. I would have thanked you for your concern, explained my tactics ansd apologised for the disruption. In my case I had no choice but to take my children with me out in public, shopping still had to be done and childcare was unavailable. So we learnt as we went. I think young mothers need access to education programs to help their parenting skills. I was told once, as a young mother that it didnt matter what choice you made when disciplining your children in public, 50% of those around you would be condemming you and the other 50% applauding.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your weekend
i have to agree, it would be fantastic if 2 things would happen:
ReplyDelete1) parents were more attentive to their kids while shopping. i don't mean coddling them by any stretch of the imagination - but if they are making a scene, leave & come back later sans child.
2) oh how i wish parents had to take (and pass) a test before they could raise a child. all we can hope for now is natural selection or a speeding bus to help us out (oh wait, that's sort of the same thing).
http://lifeonrye.blogspot.com
@Jess: It does seem that the earlier children are taught the consequences of their actions then the better. A close relative of mine with three young children has a similar philosophy. While kids will always be kids by testing the boundaries or acting up on occasion, when they know who is boss (meaning THEY AREN'T the ones running the show) then they tend to be better behaved. Good on you for keeping your little ones in line!
ReplyDelete--------------------
@Mynx: It certainly was bizarre. If there had been at least some acknowledgement or look that said 'please bear with me' I would have of course been sympathetic. This woman however could have cared less. I guess she had gotten far too accustomed to ignoring her child, which is so sad. ... And thanks for not taking this personally. This was a case of one particular 'butt nugget' whose behavior inspired me to rant about her. xo -The Empress
----------------------------
@Adam: Thanks for chiming in, I love your perspective! Removing a child from the scene is an excellent way of dealing with this sort of problem. ...Amen to tests and natural selection!
That lady def should not be having kids. Why people like that go & have children is beyond me. Somebody should call the authorities on her. That video was funny by the way. LOL!!!!
ReplyDeleteThis video made me so happy. I am also glad you took steps with the misbehaving child. I am sorry it didn't turn out so good, but I agree that a strict regimen of eugenics could work to solve all of this.
ReplyDeletebut really... about that video... god I hope that was real. Did he, or did he not, briefly try to insert his remote control into himself at one point....?
http://arealgoodblog.blogspot.com
@Anonymous: Calling the authorities seems well within reason. Glad you enjoyed the video.
ReplyDelete-------------
@Charles: Oh, me making you happy makes me happy! I was thinking of you this past week when I asserted myself vocally on no less than two occasions. Stupid woman!
As for the video, I knew that I could count on you to spot that kid trying to shove the remote up his ass! Who knew that anger could take a deviant turn toward self pleasuring ; )
Woman sitting next to my uncle in the dr's office waiting room to her 2 year old "shut the hell up or I am gonna hit your ass!"
ReplyDeleteYeah, there are really parents like this.(Just a reminder of the kind of parent that I will NOT be.)
An ex boss of mine (a complete dumbass most of the time) once said something apt that has stuck in my mind..."There's no such thing as bad children, just bad parents".
ReplyDeleteGreat blog by the way!
Empress, I agree with your actions, although I should add that I don't have kids either. But speaking as someone who works as a substitute teacher and a reporter, and thus seeing parents and kids interacting on a regular basis, you can definitely tell when a parent has it together. There is a difference between ignoring as a discipline tool, and ignoring because you're a horrible parent.
ReplyDelete@Lauramc: Definitely another example of poor parenting. Screaming and/or neglect do not make for positive parenting skills. People like that do not deserve to have children.
ReplyDelete--------------------
@Nat: Thanks for the blog love! Well, at least your former dumb arse boss had at least one decent little gem to share because that saying is oh so true!
---------------------
@Steve: Thank you for your seal of approval. I know it was a rather bold move to intervene on the situation but it was most definitely a case of 'ignoring' because someone was horrible shite of a parent.
i do agree with mynx (although i have no children myself) its hard to know what to do and it did seem that child was attention seeking but the mother could have acknowledged yourself! thats just down right rude. maybe she needs to brush up on her manners.
ReplyDeletebut the vid i have seen before and is quite funny :)
x
@PrincessBeks: The mother was an absolute waste as far as parents go. She treated her child as if he was an inconvenient burden, hence his need to seek attention. The fact that she didn't have the sense to take the child out of the store until such time that he could behave properly just showed that the only person she cared about was herself -- and the purse she was shopping for. ... Glad you enjoyed the video. That boy was full out crazy!
ReplyDeleteI wonder if it was just a bratty-ass kid and the mother is now skilled enough to block it out? What? It could happen! LOL That video is a hot mess! My sis made me watch it.
ReplyDelete@Donda: She was blocking something out that is for sure!...I'm still shaking my head over the video, especially the part where the kid appears to try and ram the TV remote up his bum. Hot mess is right!
ReplyDeleteMad Cow Disease
ReplyDelete@Display Name: You might be on to something there!
ReplyDeleteA-freakin' men! Discipline should start early! All I have to do now is give my 8 year old son The Look and he knows to shut the heck up! I cannot believe she ignored him even after you said something! Some parents are awesome!
ReplyDeleteJess
@Me, myself and I: Thanks for chiming in Jess! It sounds like you are doing a great job setting boundaries and teaching your son how to behave in public... Yes, that woman was just awesome!
ReplyDeleteWow...I don't like bratty children just as much as the next person but what do I know? I'm not a parent. MY GOD THAT VIDEO! I had no idea that kids that age still threw tantrums. That was awkward.
ReplyDeleteThe Adorkable Ditz
http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/
@The Adorkable Ditz: That kid was beyond shocking on so many levels. I bet he wanted to all but kill his brother for video taping him for the entire modern world to see.
ReplyDelete