Noisy Neighbors from Hell

I was talking with someone close to me who recently bought their first house. One of the things they were most looking forward to was no longer having to deal with noisy neighbors. If you have ever lived in an apartment, condo, townhouse or any other type of multi-family dwelling with shared walls you can probably relate. Having someone else live above, below or beside you can be positively annoying. There are the crying babies, loud TV’s, base pumping stereos, and full volume video games that come blaring through your walls at all hours of the day and night. Not to mention having to listen to other people talking, arguing, partying, stomping around, slamming doors, peeing, snoring, having sex or whatever other sorts of things inconsiderate individuals do to disturb -- and ultimately piss off their neighbors.

Upon reflection this reminded me of what had to be my all-time worst neighbors ever. No one deserved to have to live anywhere near let alone right next door to this particular couple. How they managed to slip through the cracks and actually be allowed to rent a luxury apartment is beyond anyone’s comprehension. What an absolute freaking nightmare they were! The guy loved to take late night rides around the perimeter of my former apartment complex revving his very loud motor cycle engine while kitted out in Nazi embellished apocalyptic motor cycle gear scaring any and all passerby’s. The chick was quite a piece of work as well. She had a nasty disposition, spotted multi-colored hair and looked like some sort of truck stop hooker – and probably was. Together they holed up for weeks at a time playing war video games and doing drugs. And let me tell you having your a-hole neighbors surround sound entertainment center on the same wall as your bed does not make for a good night’s sleep. When those two Jerry Springer show rejects weren’t cracked out and playing video games they were either blasting Scooby Doo cartoons through the walls, having loud/violent sex, or she was beating the crap out of him – in which case the police would usually show up. It only took a year and a half for the property managers to finally evict those losers – at which point we all sang hallelujah as I’m sure you would have as well.

Like many people I have always considered my home to be my sanctuary. The last thing anyone appreciates is having some dick for brains loud neighbor jack up one’s sleep, peace and quiet, or personal relaxing time. So attention all you noisy and rude people living in multi-family dwellings: You are not living in a barn or a frat house out in the middle of nowhere. You are living in a structure with shared walls so please show some basic consideration for the neighbors who live around you. A little common courtesy goes a long way. …I’m just saying…