Tuesday, March 15, 2011

It’s Dirty Quiz Time!

Hello my lovelies and fellow pervs! It’s been a while since we entered the naughty zone so it is about time we sex up this joint a bit. Last year we got such great and amusing response when we conducted our very own Ranter’s Box Sex Survey that I thought it would be fun to roll out a brand new survey.

To participate all you have to do is leave your responses in the comments section below. If you are shy then feel free to comment anonymously. The more responses we get the more entertaining and enlightening this little exercise will be for everyone.

And as a special prize next week I will pimp out the blog of the person that leaves the most interesting comment.

Thanks for playing!
xo The Empress

March 2011 Ranter’s Box Sex Survey

1. On a scale of one to ten, how high do you fly your freak flag?

2. What do you rate as your best skill(s) in the bedroom?

3. How much do you believe that women really enjoy giving blow jobs?

4. What is the maximum number of partners you’ve had during a single sex session?

5. Do you have any fetishes and if so what?


  1. Ok I will play along.

    1. I am about an 8.

    2. My best skill is going down on the ladies. I have had a couple of ex's who said I should "get a Nobel Prize in licking poon". Their words, not mine.

    3. Not very much at all. If she enjoys it, she is lying.

    4. I plead the 5th amendment on this one.

    5. I also plead the 5th amendment on this one too.

  2. @Oilfield Trash: Nobel Prize you say? Very intriguing! Would love elaboration on #4 & 5. Just call me a curious george(tte).

  3. Well... I've been taking quizzes all week so why not one more?

    1. I'll go with 8.

    2. I can't pin down any one or two. I'm pretty multi-talented in that dep't.

    3. Sadly, not much.

    4. I'll be honest. Only one... Except in my head, that is.

    5. I draw large stick boobs. 'Nuff said.

  4. can't pass this up...

    1. freak flag is about 5...i am pretty boring unless you count the cherry pie filling and whip cream incident(s)...oh, and the body paint and the m&m thing...and icecubes..i don't remember (m)any other freaky things...see, mr boring...

    2. beaver muching...if you are good at this phase of it all, the rest is easy...most women are multiple, if you can get them one, the rest are easy...and guys...don't stay with a woman that is hard to make come...but you can send her my way if she is hot!

    3. women like giving blowjobs? where are these women?

    4. never more than one partner at a time,but not for lack of trying...i have attempted The Ultimate Male Fantasy (TUMF) on many an occasion only to get rebuffed...i so thought dating lezbos was the key! however, one day i did have two different partners hours apart...it was not pretty when the girls found out about each other...

    ahhhh youth!

    5. lately, i have been finding older women more attractive...so, i would say i am reverting to my teen years...hope the refractory period comes back as well!


  5. I am going to take a bit of time and consider the questions and get back to you. hehe

  6. Oooohhhh I love these!!

    1. 11 for sure!!

    2. I give amazing head (I learn from porn & 'cause I can read a man's body language like nobody's business) & I can also give a man multiples...withing minutes of each other

    3. Ummmm...I love it. I do have girlfriends who hate it tho so I think it'll all depend.

    4. Only one...I don't like to share!

    5. Holy christ...what counts as a fetish? Is having sex a fetish? 'cause I think that's mine...

  7. Okay. I'm in. Just because it's you.

    1. I'm gonna go w/a 8.5 to a 9 depending on who I'm with.

    2. uhm...my best? Well. There are a few...and to be quite honest...it's turning me on just thinking about saying it, so I think I just won't...I have a reputation to uphold.

    3. As a woman...on a scale of 1-10, I'm going to say an 7 to 8, it just depends on who I"m with and how well he "keeps" himself. Honestly..I quite like it...

    4. One. more than one doesn't really appeal to me...at least not in my head. lol

    5. I do...baby oil is involved. That's all I can really say.

    And as for OTs responses..I really really really wanna know more about #2..*wink*

    You are such a bad influence.

  8. 1. I think I'm a solid 8-what with my Naughty Nothings blog airing most of them.

    2. Either giving head or being open to experimentation and vocal about my needs.

    3. Honestly, I know some women don't enjoy it-and most men don't believe it-but I seriously LOVE it! Like, LOVE it!

    4. For the sake of research I will admit: 2.

    5. I love biting (not breaking skin). That rush of adrenaline when somebody nips at you! So hot.

  9. I'll Play.

    1. I'll go with 9.5 to 10, but the DW is more of a 6~7

    2. My best skill also is going south. Well she may not think it's my best skill, but I enjoy it the most.

    3. Not at all

    4. Just one

    5. I'm a foot guy

  10. @Vinny C: I love how the male readers are confident in their bedroom abilities. And I love your stick boob figures. They are awesome!

    @Oilfield Trash: Go Oily!!

    @Bruce: Consider this research for our upcoming joint blog-post. Clever huh? ...Oh, and the cherry pie filling sounds fascinating ; )

    @Mynx: You sly Mynx! Come back soon because a prize is involved.

    @AbsolutelyPrimed: Thanks for being candid about some women not being all that fond of knob-slobbing. By the way, did your profile name happen to be inspired by your love for sex?

    @Cinderita: Thank you so much for playing and there is even a prize up for grabs. I'm with you when it comes to the whole not sharing thing. As for the baby oil it conjures up memories of trash bags and impromptu sex in front of the pizza guy...

    @Jewels: Two? And biting? Go you vampire vixen!

  11. yes! well played my empress...well played!

  12. OK, I'll weigh in on this one:
    1. I guess it depends - for the SF Bay Area (where I have lived my entire life), I'd probably be a 5, for the rest of the country, a 9. I'm Bi, so I guess that makes it kind of freaky at times :-)
    2. Blow Jobs. I learned from a gay man I was dating.
    3. Some like it more than others, and I go in cycles of liking it, and hating it.
    4. Sadly, one.
    5. Happily, many - Anal, Bondage, Spanking, Strap Ons, Leather Mini Skirts (sigh)...

  13. You know i'm game!

    1. I would rate myself a 9, i'm pretty open sexually, but I do draw a line at a few things

    2. Well, if you say just sex, I would rate myself a 8, I know I can put it down pretty good. but, if you were to rate my blow jobs, I know I give a 10+ there.

    3. I don't know why people think women lie when they say that. I love giving blow jobs, it really gets my oven going, if you know what I mean.

    4. Okay this one is hard to admit.. now is this people besides yourself? I had sex with 3 people (besides me) before.. wow, maybe i am a nympho.

    5. My fetish is a little hard to admit too, but I love doing it doggy style, getting my hair pulled, my ass slapped, and called a dirty slut.. all at the same time.

    OMG, i hope you don't hate me now, LOL.


  14. So I don't think I have ever commented on your blog before so I'm going to jump in head first and give this a go because it looks like fun and what the hell. Go big or go home I say.

    1. This highly depends on my intoxication level, the higher that level rises, the higher my flag rises. I will say I range from a 6-9.

    2. I don't think I have ever gotten a complaint in any area, but I would say down south is my specialty.

    3. Even though I claim it as my specialty I can't say it's my favorite thing to do. I will not complain and certainly won't shy away from it, but to be completely honest this is something I do completely for his benefit and satisfaction.

    4. One. I do not share well and prefer for both parties to be completely focused on one another.

    5. Oh boy. I'm not sure if I have one specific fetish but I enjoy a little rough play such as biting and I have been known to leave a few scratches in my day.

  15. I think I'm a decade too old to be answering these gems.

  16. I'm sorry - I'm laughing too hard to answer any of the questions!

  17. Ok I'll answer this one just because it is up my alley.

    1. Umm not very actually. I'd say only a 6.

    2. Depends on the girl really. So I'd say my best skill is reading the womans body language. Some women don't like some things. I can generally figure that out without her saying so.

    3. Again, some women love it. Personally, it has to be a damn good blowjob for me to enjoy it. I've had good ones, generally by women that like to give head, and I've had bad ones, generally from women who don't like to do it. I will never ask for one, but I won't say no.

    4. 3...

    5. You name it, I've probably done it or curious. Minus the feet... that one I don't get.

  18. Ok I am back
    #1 - I will say 5 (like Bruce),
    because I have been married a long time and we know what works and what doesnt.

    #2 - Oh I love testing those pelvic floor muscles while being on top. Subtle and effective. (You learn how to be very quiet with kids)

    #3 two part question that should have been. The second question whether a woman realy enjoys it when a guy blows his load in her mouth. Me, I love giving head to get him good and hard, as part of foreplay but when he cums, I want it to be somewhere other than my cheeks

    #4 Just the one, i am an old fashioned girl (we wont count fantasies)

    #5 Fetish? Not really, just lots of touching, especially my feet, neck, fingers. A bit of light bondage can mix things up. And toys are fun too, but I guess these arent really fetish, more just preferences.

  19. @Bruce: Thanks. Getting some fascinating info we can use.

    @J9: That is hilarious that your score is minimized for SF! Strap-ons, very adventurous!!

    @AmberLaShell: Thanks for playing along so enthusiastically. Wow, three. Cool. Dirty slut too? And no, of course I don't hate you.

    @greeneyes: Thank you so much for stopping by and chiming in. It is always great to get comments from readers who normally don't comment. Also, I appreciate your candid view on women and BJ's. As for the scratching, you go kitty cat! ; )

    @CopyBoy: Too old? If I remember correctly it isn't like you are part of the geriatric crowd. We have readers in all age brackets over at this crazy blog. If you reconsider, a particularly interesting response to the quiz will put in the running for me to pimp out your blog (even though you are already a blogging rock star).

    @On My Soapbox: That's OK. As long as you are enjoying the post that's all that matters.

    @Not the Hero: For only considering yourself a 6 on the freak scale, 3 partners at once automatically ups the height of your flag on the flag pole.

    @Mynx: Yay, you are back! So, thumbs down on the special facials? ; )

  20. On the scale of 1-10 I'd give myself a solid 10 on freak scale. However I only fly a flag of 6.

  21. Perhaps not the face, but I certainly don't mind it on the cleavage. Finger painting anybody?

  22. 1. As high up my arse as I can get it.
    2. Very highly as she is sitting next to me while I write this.
    3. They wouldn't call it a job if they enjoyed it.
    4. Are we talking only human partners here?
    5. Elbow sex.

  23. A new sex survey! Yummy! I reserve the right to plead 'drunk' if I decide later on that these answers are in any way embarrassing or otherwise expose me as a freakazoid.

    1. On a scale of one to ten, how high do you fly your freak flag?
    I can't even see that bitch anymore it's flying so high.

    2. What do you rate as your best skill(s) in the bedroom?
    I'm good at it all, but I have been called the 'head doctor' a time or twelve.

    3. How much do you believe that women really enjoy giving blow jobs?
    Speaking as a woman, I have to say that I don't enjoy the act of it as much as I do a man's enjoyment of my skills. It's purely an ego thing. I give head in order that my on head may swell. ;)

    4. What is the maximum number of partners you’ve had during a single sex session?
    Do I have to answer this one honestly? Okay...four, but that's my final answer.

    5. Do you have any fetishes and if so what?
    Big dicks. You had to have seen that one coming. No pun intended.

  24. @Not a Hero: So you keep the 10 on the down low I gather. ; )

    @Mynx: VERY Naughty Mynx!!

    @Tony Van Helsing: Hmmm... non-animal partners, flags up the arse and elbow sex ...Oh My!

    @Mrs. Hyde: I have to concur with your thoughts on BJ's. As of this moment you have the highest score for #4. I'm with you on the big ding dongs as well ; )

  25. 1. I'm with J9 on this one. In middle America where I live, I'm probably an 8. For everywhere else, I'm more like a 6.

    2. What do you rate as your best skill(s) in the bedroom? Ever since I discovered gay porn in high school, I have received high marks for fellatio.

    3. How much do you believe that women really enjoy giving blow jobs? I guess I believe that pretty strongly since I do. I used to think of it as a chore, but it's definitely grown on me.

    4. What is the maximum number of partners you’ve had during a single sex session? Two - a guy and a girl.

    5. Do you have any fetishes and if so what? I've discovered in the last few months that I have a voyeuristic streak in me. Also, I'm a huge fan of boobs. I can be worse than some guys.

  26. 1. I would think that I'm a huge freak but then I hear about enemas and other scary things and I think I must not be as freaky as I think. Ummm...7?

    2. I'm brilliant at it all, but I've received the most compliments with my skill at being on top.

    3. It depends on the woman and the guy she is with. If I care about the person then I enjoy giving them pleasure. If it's someone that I am just romping with, then I enjoy the power and control of giving head.

    4. Only one

    5. I have a penchant for leather corsets, handcuffs and high heel boots during sex...biting (not too hard though)--does that count or are these things too mainstream now to be considered a fetish? o0?

  27. @Bagel Fairy: You are the second person to comment about how they learned the skill of knob-slobbing through watching gay porn. Interesting.

    @Katsidhe: Dominatrix style? Cool.

  28. I'll play along too. Though I'm not sure how you're going to pick the winner.

    1) I proudly fly the freak flag as high as the pole will reach. So I'd say at least a 10 (though, my partners might argue that it's really only a 5 or 6)

    2) This one is easy. My best skill in the bedroom is my imagination: the ability to assess the situation and come up with a fun and creative solution to make everyone happy.

    3) I believe that this depends on the reaction of the man getting the blow job. Most women (or men for that matter) are only doing this to please their partner. Very little physical pleasure is derived from the act of sucking. If, however the recipient is having a good time and expressing that to the giver, that makes the experience better. So men, take the advice my ex-wife gave me on this subject: "The more you show me you like it, the more you'll get." Then EVERYONE gets what they want from it.

    4) Ironically, the answer to question four, for me is 4.

    5) Fetish? I like to be in control. Seeing a partner completely willing to do whatever I ask, is a huge turn on for me. It's even better if it's non verbal. To be able to give a look or body movement and have my partner react is hot! It's like having a human puppet. You feel like a god.

  29. 1. On a scale of one to ten, how high do you fly your freak flag?
    7...the thing is, in the past I've never really been involved with people as freaky as me, so I tone down, which is fine.

    2. What do you rate as your best skill(s) in the bedroom?
    I'm an excellent kisser and I have magic fingers. Everything else I think simply depends on the female. I'll admit that there are plenty of dudes who are better at sex than me. But once you get the chemistry down with a girl, none of that matters.

    3. How much do you believe that women really enjoy giving blow jobs?
    I think it depends on who they're blowing. If they like the dude, they'll typically like giving the blowjob. I've had girls do it when I didn't think they particularly enjoyed it...then other times they loved it. What they do with their hands tells it all. Caressing the chest, stuff like that. Moaning as well helps. Damn I love blow jobs.

    4. What is the maximum number of partners you’ve had during a single sex session?

    5. Do you have any fetishes and if so what?
    Nope. Sorry to be boring, but it's true. I guess I'm a butt guy, but it's not at a fetish level.

  30. @imajeepguy: Thanks for playing along. Wow, you really are a god! I think it is a two-way tie right now for the most number of partners at once. I'm still chuckling over the part where you mentioned 'human puppet'.

    @Danaconda: Merci beaucoup for stopping by. Toning yourself down to a 7 eh? I always guessed you were a kinky little freak. (YAY!) ...Thanks for your input on knob-slobbing. I'm gathering research for a blogging collaboration I'll be doing at the end of the month. Should be juicy!

  31. 1. On a scale of one to ten, how high do you fly your freak flag? I proudly fly it at the top of the flag pole!

    2. What do you rate as your best skill(s) in the bedroom? Oral

    3. How much do you believe that women really enjoy giving blow jobs? 50%, the other 50% hate it but do it anyway

    4. What is the maximum number of partners you’ve had during a single sex session? 3 plus me

    5. Do you have any fetishes and if so what? #4 with more people

  32. Sweet!

    1. Hmmm...currently it's probably a 7. In my younger days, definitely off the charts.

    2. Two things. I give the most incredible blow job known to man. And, I'm more limber than a prepubescent, growth-stunting Olympic gymnast.

    3. Most women? Probably not a lot. Me? Oh yes. Oh yes. I get off on knowing I am just that goddamn good.

    4. Four, including myself. Two guys, another girl, and myself.

    5. Aside from silly things like corsets and filthy pillow talk, I'd rather not say. I'd probably wind up in a padded room. Let's just say that sometimes, my husband has a hard time complying with my requests.

  33. When do you announce the winner? I'm hoping I'm still in the running, cuz you "pimping" my blog would be a coup and might get me a few more followers. Either way, I hope you do more surveys, this was fun.

  34. Okay, I started reading the comments and then decided I didn't have enough time. Sheesh, people!

    1. That's pretty relative to the audience, but I guess probably an 8.

    2. Don't judge me for being lame, but I always give more than I receive.

    3. That depends on my partner and his reactions. Call me crazy but I feed off of reactions. Overall, I don't think too many women enjoy it, though I think it's a gag thing.

    4. One... If it isn't good enough one-on-one, it isn't good enough for me.

    5. Okay, that is definitely one I plead the fifth on. We all have fetishes, but I won't go there on a random survey. :P

  35. @Krissy: Thanks for stopping by and playing along. You can always go to today's post where I did a recap of the survey results. ...And nothing wrong with pleading the 5th. It generally indicates there is something juicy to keep mum about! ; )


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