From churchy little girl next door to fame whore extraordinaire, Heidi Montag (or whatever the hell she is calling herself these days) is certainly giving P. Hilty a run for the money when it comes to trying to stay in the highly sought after public spotlight.
With all the fake marriages and divorces, horrific attempts at singing and acting, wardrobe malfunctions, outrageous amounts of plastic surgery and alleged girl-on-girl sex tapes, it appears there is absolutely no line that Heidi wouldn’t cross just to stay front and center on the covers of all those trashy tabloid magazines.
Here is Heidi plotting her attempt to become the next human Barbie:
When “Operation Barbie” didn’t go over so well, Heidi then concocted a highly publicized divorce from her wackadoodle husband Spencer. Nobody cared. She then had to think a bit more creatively:
Most recently Heidi has been making uninvited (photo) appearances at breast cancer walks and tweeting that she is giving herself a soft tissue massage while reminding all the other fake-boobied ladies out there that they have to keep those implants soft.
When oh when will the madness stop?...
Ewww she's gross. Boobs that big are not that appealing once they start sagging!
ReplyDeletehttp://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/
@The Adorkable Ditz: Apparently her boobs are a size "G"! Give her a few years and she will be having to toss those melons over her shoulders just to walk.
ReplyDeleteI am never one to skip over a post about boobs (fake or otherwise) and sex tapes, especially on your blog. And the bonus here is that I get to take my own shot at the fame whore du jour that is Heidi Spencer. As horribly annoying as she is, for some reason I am even more annoyed by Spencer.
ReplyDeleteI don't know dick about either of them and never watched that show they were on. But being a pop culture fan I have them both forced on me far too much. I just want to know who out there would honestly call themselves a fan of such jackasses???
That being said, I still appreciated the post about boobs... both literal and figurative.
SD
http://simpledudecomplexworld.blogspot.com/
HER BOOBS ARE BIGGER THAN HER FACE.
ReplyDeletethat is all.
Holy shit those are revolting! Why would anyone do that to themselves? I have to admit, I had a boob job, but I only went to a small C, and no-one can tell... hers are almost comical... in a sick way...
ReplyDeleteGood God ....boobies are great, but that is INSANE.. just sayin.. My guy likes boobs, most men do , but who would want to lay next to that for very long.
ReplyDeleteBeing a woman of generous "assets" I am amazed that women actually pay to get huge fake breasts. They look ridiculous. Who is she anyway? I really need to start reading womens magazines I think.
ReplyDeleteI often wonder, "Dear God, why am I an all-male ass bandit?" And then Whoredi Montag pops up on my screen and it suddenly all makes sense..
ReplyDeleteEWWWWWWWWWWW! Sorry I don't find big boobs appealing at all! She is going to have major back pain soon. D:
ReplyDeleteI just don't get why she felt the need to get all that plastic surgery. I don't know much about her but I saw a picture of her before the surgery and she looked just fine!
I guess it will stop when people stop giving her the attention she wants. Media is a viscious circle like that. We want to know...but us wanting to know keeps these wastes of human flesh paid. She makes me ill!
ReplyDelete@Simple Dude: Glad you enjoyed the homage to boobage. Of those two d-bags, I agree that Spencer takes the cake when it comes to being a dick. But I'm also guessing Heidi is far from being an innocent victim in all of their shenanigans. She seems rather manipulative and desperate for attention. They both make me vomit!
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@Nicki: Right you are! Who does that to themselves?
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@Molly Malone: Everything that is the hot mess otherwise known as Heidi is indeed comical!
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@The Chick in the Chair: It must be like snuggling up to a couple of basketballs.
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@Mynx: Heidi used to be a normal girl next door until she became one of the characters on that reality show called "The Hills". Everything went downhill from there...
@Rabbit: OMG! You crack me up!! I love your nickname for her. It's perfect! And with chicks like her I can't blame you for wanting to remain on your all booty team. xo
ReplyDelete@The Adorkable Ditz: You are right. Heidi actually looked better before she had those 12 crazy surgeries.
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@Jewels: I refuse to buy trash tabloids for that very reason. Even taking the piss at Heidi here on my blog goes against my instinct help bury that crazy bitch once and for all!
You know she only had all those procedures for the publicity. The pictures of her before and after are amazing. I can't believe it is even the same girl. I heard she wants to have size H boobs for Heidi.
ReplyDeleteWTF.
She is such a role model for loving yourself as you are ha ha!
Jess
@nicki: OMG. You're right. Those boobs are ginormous.
ReplyDeleteficklecattle.blogspot.com
omg... SHE'S CRAZY!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletei wonder how it feels to be carrying those kind of packages up front.. lol
@Me, Myself and I: Yes, anything for publicity is right! I heard the "H" size boobies story too. Maybe she will get them so big that she will just float away never to be heard of again!
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@Fickle Cattle: They really and truly are about the same size as her head. Crikey!
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@Miss Innocent: Thanks for the blog love! ...I think her middle name is "crazy".
She does all of that without once considering having an affair with me and then revelling in the attention that would bring.
ReplyDeleteHave a nice day, from a disappointed Boonie
@Boonie S: I think you should have your people call her people. There just might be a sex tape in it for you!
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