Dick Heads … and not the kind that are fun to play with!

Dick head: (noun) a descriptive word used for someone who is considered to be dishonest, selfish and/or mean.

Whether you call them pricks, wankers, nob heads, a-holes, tossers or d-bags, they are all basically the same, meaning they are someone who has a ginormous penis sprouting from his or possibly her face.

And yes, I am talking about that rude mofo customer service agent. Or the punk ass kid who pulls his bicycle in front of your car at a major intersection only to carelessly and cavalierly roll said bicycle back into the front end of your car. Or the insecure jackass of a supervisor at your work who because of their incompetence makes your life a living hell.

But the individual who takes the prize for total dickwaddery or gluteolacunosity (assholeness) is the player dude who parades around disguised in nice guys’ clothing:



He comes across as kind, considerate, respectful, fun, affectionate and totally into the woman he is with at the time. However lurking just beneath the surface is a major player who can only be described as the one and only absolute King of the Dick Heads.

Ladies and/or gents you will know with certainty that you have engaged with one of these dick heads because he will be the guy that:

1. Is in full-on copulation mode 24/7 or whenever he can find a donut to stick his thingy in.

2. Constantly emphasizes just how busy he is with business and family but in reality you discover he is spending all his time trolling every dating site known to mankind.

3. Is highly adept at emotional manipulation and making his conquests think he is completely and utterly into them.

4. Simultaneously ‘dates’ several of his conquests, most of whom are unaware that they are but one of many.

5. Doesn’t understand the meaning of a relationship and is therefore incapable of actually having one.

6. Is a supreme arsehole so spare yourself and steer the heck clear!

And to the King of Dick Heads that this special post has been dedicated, all I can say is that the day will come when you realize that you totally effed things up with one awesome, amazing and sexy woman who would have rocked your world. So put that in your pipe and suck it dude!

Reality TV - "I mean, who does that?"

Reality TV in general is a bit like visiting a televised human zoo. Put fame-hungry participants inside a television fishbowl, stir in some manufactured drama and watch the mayhem begin. Whether these types of shows are completely fake, semi-scripted or just too freaking crazy for anyone to have made up, reality television certainly makes for an interesting study in human behavior. Cast members tend to be either bitchy, stupid, trashy, overly emotional, manipulative, slutty, domineering, attention seeking -- or just plain wackadoodle. And sometimes those human train wrecks otherwise known as reality ‘stars’ are blessed with several or even all of those highly appealing attributes. I know this because I have been earning my armchair doctorate in psychology by watching this season’s critically acclaimed show The Bachelorette. Yes, I am somewhat embarrassed to admit this fact, but even so there is nothing quite like watching 25 guys going head-to-head in highly unrealistic situations trying to win the affections of one lone girl. The power plays, backstabbing, crying, and sheer craziness demonstrated by some of the men on this show are absolutely legendary. Seriously, a couple of these dudes need to either check themselves into the nearest psycho ward, grow some balls, or just plain never show their faces in public again. Case in point, check out this video of wussy Justin Rego an ‘entertainment wrestler’ from Canada who literally attempts to escape through the bushes after being caught out for having not one but two girlfriends back home:



I’m pretty much guessing this little escapade of Justin’s won’t bode too well for his career as ‘Rated R’ the scary professional wrestler nor for his love life now that all the ladies across the globe know what a lying, conniving tool he REALLY is. Buh-bye Rated R, don't let the dressing room door hit you in the ass!